11/8/22 The Separation of Self-Judgment

 I forgive myself for being extremely angry with and at myself.

I forgive myself for Ccepting and allowing myself to hate myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create a messed up life for myself by and through accepting and allowing myself to judge myself and judge life, not realizing that self judgment is really the main or one of the main things and reasons why I have been so stuck in a messed up life, because by judging myself as bad j am separating myself from good by splitting myself into two - as I believe (as the belief) that if I am bad then I am not good, and within this trapping myself within a self perpetuating vicious cycle of being bad as judging myself as bad as bad also meaning less than, and then judging myself even further by judging myself as bad for being bad, and then believing that I am so bad that I am too far separated from what is good to ever get truly better. When this separation is not who I really am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in eeing and judging myself as bad as separated from good I have in this judged myself as bad and judged myself with guilt, shame, fear, creating self pity and regret as me blinding myself through self judgments and my energetic reaction within and as the self judgment tk were I become consumed and lost within self judgment and the vicious energetic cycle it creates.

I realize life is here and is neither good or bad. It's not good because if I say life is good I am already within that creating separation between good and bad. I realize that when I judge myself and life as good or bad I am separating myself from myself jnstead of being here and understanding myself.
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I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel like shit right now.
I forgive myself for believing that I deserve to feel like shit right now.
I forgive myself for allowing myself and accepting to judge myself as to believe that I deserve to feel like shit right now because I am and or have accepted and allowed myself to be a bad person.
I forgive myself that I have created a life of extensive guilt by accepting and allowing myself to divide myself into and through judgment as good and bad where I have fallen into the bad category and in thatbseparated myself from myself where I separate myself of a part of myself as good, and in that remained incomplete missing a part of myself, bizarrely believing that I do not have access to that part of myself because Iapplication?

So what does this mean jn terms of specific practical applocation?

I forgive myself for judging myself as not good.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe that I have to live in separation of good because I am too much of a bad person.
I forgive myselfnthat I have become enslaved within the point of masturbatiin to picture images and self judgment as judging and defining and believing myself to be bad and less than because I have accepted and allowed myself to exist as enslaved to the addiction of masturbation/anal masturbation to picture images/videos especially of womens' asses.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create extensive self separation in myself from myself for many years of my life through and as self judgment to the point to where j now find myself extensively hating myself and my life as I have created and accumulated an extensive amount of self hatred throughout the years which I have created with and through judging myself as bad and unworthy and reprehensible in a very personal way.
I forgive myself that j have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from myself even further by and through accepting and allowing myself to project my accepted and allowed self judgment onto others where I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my accepted and allowed creation of self judgment and in that j have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from taking responsibility for my accepted and allowed creation, and in that I have accepted and allowed myself to create myself as and exist within and as self pity and victimization and powerlessness - all of this through my acceptance and allowance to project my self judgment onto others by and through judging them instead of accepting and allowing myself to face my self judgment from the staring point of self forgiveness as the starting point of trying to understand myself instead of judge myself.

.....I realize that when I am experiencing myself as karanoid as fearing others will judge me I am in that moment separating myself from myself by and through blaming them for making me feel that way and even trying to avoid going near them because of the fear that they will judge me, instead of bringing it back to myself and instead of asking myself why do I fear them judging me, asking myself why and how am i judging myself right now.

More generally it seems this applies to any reaction j can possibly gave towards another person, that I am jn that moment accepting and allowing me to separate myself from myself, where I instead can immediately ask myself how/why am I judging myself right now.